Destination Addiction- withdrawal symptoms and cure!

Most of us spent our time, sometime our whole lives, under the influence of destination addiction. Trying to get somewhere constantly- mostly a goal in future, where happiness lies.  A place where we will be “complete”, ” wholesome”, and happy. This could be a job, partner, house, holiday, status or position. The obsession to attain a goal and the subsequent drive removes us from the present moment and replaces this with the future. A future that does not exist. The only moment in time that ever exists, is the present moment, the rest is past and future.

Such is the pull of this addiction that our judgment is completely clouded. Our days are spent in a state of ” unconscious” – not literal but mental and spiritual. There is a list of tasks to be accomplished by the end of each day, week and month. The beauty of the present moment is lost, the feeling of being truly alive is taken over by the anxiety about future.

Don’t confuse working towards achieving  “your true calling” with goal obsession. The later could be very short term as well. Thinking about tomorrow, obsessing over holiday planning, anxiety about the next job etc. etc.

True gratitude for what you have, keep you grounded. Its keeps you present and free to enjoy the beauty that surrounds you. This is  very difficult to practice when adversity hits you- as I recently experienced. Do what you have to do to resolve your issues without truly getting embroiled,  and if and when you can’t do anything more, be grateful and get back in the present moment.

Diabolically the less you try to chase goals and stay in the present moment the more you will achieve with  true contentment and happiness.



The Disease called Overthinking – do you suffer from it?


Overthinking, in essence, is an inability to relax mentally. It is a constant engagement with the inner voice in one’s head and an incessant need to plan the future meticulously.

Overthinking is opposite to the concept of “staying in the moment”. Over-thinkers are in constant dialogue with the inner voice in the head. The voice that draws upon your experiences from the past and fears for the future. This little “advisor” in your head tells you to regret your past mistakes, lament your failures and is fearful of what could possibly go wrong in future. The present moment does not exist for over-thinkers- life is lived in the past or future.

Amongst the myriad of causes of this affliction, scarcity of faith and lack of gratitude for ones blessings, are right at the top of the list. A breath of fresh air, two legs to stand on, being bestowed with the gift of vision, having clean water to drink, are few of the many things to be grateful for. To have genuine faith in the idea “everything happens for a reason” helps you relinquish control. It takes away the desire to manipulate and control life, pulling your attention away from the future and helping divert it to the present moment. The, “it is what it is”, cliche has a lot more to it than merely a combination of a few letters and words.

Stay in the present, don’t overthink and over complicate. Moaning when you are stuck in traffic, complaining about the dreadful weather, regretting past mistakes, worrying about future events; just let it go. Happiness lies in the present moment – this second is the only real time we have. Stay with it………




Stop waiting and start living. Suhail Anwar

Are you waiting for the upcoming holiday to have a great time? are you still waiting for that opportunity to come along  so you can have your dream job? or is the next big house, as soon as this one is sold, that will surely make you happy? What about waiting for the companion that will make you feel fulfilled? still waiting to achieve that six pack or weight loss that will give you your long lost confidence? wait till the weather is good before you can enjoy? wait till you have enough money to buy what you want?

Waiting is a disease, a curse of the sub-consciouteous mind. This is the part of your mind  that is always trying to solve problems, always striving to take over, always planning and scheming for promise of a better future. If you are actively monitoring your thoughts  you will realise that living in the future is all we do most of the time. Future actually doesn’t exist; the only thing that is real is the present moment. That is all we have got, to surrender to the present, to accept “WHAT IS” is the essence of living in the moment.

Nothing wrong with knowing the general direction of your life. We have to do what needs to be done, to get to where we want to go. This is, however quite different from obsessing over future events so much so that we forget to live in the present and enjoy everything that we have in this moment. Living in the moment means to accept the present, be grateful and content. This is not the same as being non ambitious- ambitions are good as long as they don’t deter you from living in the present. Always striving and never arriving … is not a good state to be in. Just surrender to the present moment and you will experience real peace.




The voice in the head- friend or foe?

How often do you talk to yourself? That voice in your head – the one that thinks about the past, plans for the future, the one that gives you advice, judges people, compares you to others, reviews situations, forms opinions and is very busy in analysing and interpreting life. Almost all the time, I think, for most people anyway.

This voice in our head is the voice of our conditioned subconscious mind. The conditioning that we receive from our parents, education, media and society in general. This becomes part of our subconscious mind, the part of our brain that control our behaviour without us thinking about it. A bit like driving, where we go through the motions without really consciously thinking  about what we are doing.

To free your mind from this inner voice is the definition of true liberation- its the path to freedom and enlightenment. Its what “living in the moment” is all about. You can free your mind by being an observer of this inner voice. Catch yourself when comparing, judging, criticising, analysing, regretting, being ungrateful, sad, fearful and anxious. With practice you will identify the triggers the incite these feelings. Replace these with gratitude, kindness, empathy, a non-judgmental behaviour, trust, faith, integrity and love. Remember your thoughts create your feelings. Learn and practice to feel good and the inner voice will slowly perish leaving you alone to live and enjoy everyday as it comes.

Desires, visualisation and knowing. Suhail Anwar

We all have desires and dreams. We wish and dream about a better life, more money, a nicer house, a better body, a dream partner, the career of our choice and umpteen holidays. There is actually a small percentage of people in this world that have it all, and more. So why is it that some have it and others don’t?

It might be a little bit of a challenge to explain this in a small blog but if I was pushed to summarise it, I would say, eradicate fear-fear is the enemy, and it will all be yours. To manifest your dreams you have to promote those dreams to a level of visualisation and eventually a deep knowing that all is within your grasp. The biggest hurdle between these stages is the fear of failure,  the fear of unknown,  the fear of being ridiculed  by family, friends, and the world in general. The “safe play strategy”, “the conservative approach” is essentially a fear of failure. Waiting for the perfect moment (there is no such thing) is merely procrstination. Unlimited abundance will evade you unless you relentlessly pursue your dreams with passion and a deep faith in the universe.

An honest passion with integrity, a desire to serve eventually, a non-competitive behaviour and perpetual gratitude with an always giving and not demanding attitude has to be a part of your personality to solidify your trust in this universe which eventually leads of the deep knowing and manifestations of our dreams. Don’t let your circumstances dictate your  life story, write it yourself and you will be bestowed with riches beyond your wildest imagination. Continue reading “Desires, visualisation and knowing. Suhail Anwar”

Live in the moment… What does it actually mean? by Suhail Anwar

The age old cliche.. live in the moment- we hear it a lot these days. It is apparently the key to success and happiness, the prime ingredient in the life of positively motivated, successful individuals. When faced with the day to day distractions of life, is it easier said than done, to live in the moment? what the hell does it mean any way.

Thinking about the past, regrets and remorse over events that have already happened, guilt over wrong doings in the past, dwelling over mishaps from the past -all lead to depression. Worrying about the future, planning and plotting obsessively and incessantly, a goal setting and target achieving mentality- all lead to anxiety. Living in the moment means just exactly that, living for now, in this second and minute. Letting go of the past, letting go of yesterday – learning and moving on.. is living in the moment. To know your calling, having goals and then letting go of them- to enjoy what you have in this moment.. is living in the moment.

You cannot live in the moment unless your heart is full of gratitude for everyone and everything. You cannot live in the moment unless you are prepared to forgive and forget events and people who have done you wrong. Living in the moment requires a whole lot of mental positive attitude. We all did it when we were kids, we had no regrets, no worries .. we truly lived in the moment and enjoyed every single second of it. Surely we can do it again.

Separation and alignment?The concept of oneness. by Suhail Anwar

On a micro-molecular level all things, living and non living, are made of the same stuff. Though science is still dissecting these nano particles, when we do eventually break the smallest particle what do you think we will find?

Oneness of the universe and all that exists in it, is crucial to the under standing of the positive energy that flows through us ,and all that exists in this universe. The deep rooted belief that we are connected to all and all is connected to us,  brings abundance and richness in our lives. The concept of separation from others, people or the universe, introduces the need for judgement. When you judge others you define yourself, not them.

Separation is introduced at a very early stage into our lives, “them vs. us”, “dog eat dog world”, ” a bite of a cherry” are some of the “survival skills” deemed essential for progress and competition.

To belief in the oneness of the universe is fundamental in aligning yourself to receive all the goodness the universe has to offer. Try not to judge others, its not always easy , but it works.


The thing we call stress! by Suhail Anwar

The dictionary definition of stress is “a state of mental or emotional strain or tension resulting from adverse or demanding circumstances”. My definition of stress is ” a state of unhappiness with self or circumstances leading to mental strain resulting in physical manifestations”.

You see there is a subtle difference: the difference is about taking responsibility. You are responsible for your own happiness and mood. The way we perceive the world, our family, friends, job, health, money, career and life in general, affects how the world responds back. A neurotic behaviour of suspicion, jealousy, keeping grudges and trying to control others breeds negative vibes effecting the physical and spiritual self. An attitude of calmness, friendliness, forgiveness and trust “raises the spirit” metaphorically and literally.

We have to have the willingness to take responsibility for our thoughts and actions. Giving others the power to control our mood and actions leads to a neurotic behaviour. Stress comes from within- not outside. Faith, gratitude, deeds of kindness and love  for all, allows you to “respond with ability”. Our circumstances are a product of our thoughts. The source of stress is located within you- nurture an attitude of love and faith, its the ultimate stress buster.

Intuition or intelligence? Where do we draw the line? Suhail Anwar

In my recent blog we talked about goal setting. We rely on our intelligence to plan our lives. Compared to other life forms, we are bestowed with the gift of intellect- we figure things out, that’s what we do. In this modern world, success demands immaculate planning and careful mapping of the future. We rely heavily on our sensory perceptions and memory to process data in order to learn from the past and plan our futures – so much so that sometimes we just forget to live in the present.

Intuition is a gift of the soul. It’s the unadulterated part of you that is separate from intellect. Intuition is the mind behind the brain, the “I” behind the flesh and bones. Intuition keeps you calm, it allays anxiety and keeps you in the present. Just like all mental skills, intuition has to be developed and enhanced. To have faith in the goodness of the universe is the first step. To believe in the oneness of universe, the oneness of human kind is the main building block of an intuitive mind. An overload of intellect is sometimes at loggerheads with intuition. Intellect emphasises on planning, goal-setting and meeting deadlines. Intuitive decisions, on the contrary emphasise on faith, belief and trust in the supernatural. Its about relinquishing control from self to God, letting go of the pressures and saying focused on the present pleasures of life.

Be grateful for what you have got – trust in the universal power and have faith in your intuitive decisions.

The importance of thoughts.

Millions of thoughts go through our mind every day. When we are working, operating, driving, talking to other folks, even when asleep -our head is full of thoughts, most of the time. Almost all of these are reactive, thoughts that pop up as a reaction to what is happening around us. We let these thoughts lose in our brains, swivelling around sometimes in and out like a fleeting passerby and sometimes dwelling on them for hours, either attached with regrets from past or planning our future moves.

Can we control our thoughts ? Can we monitor them? What goes through our head consciously or sub-conscioulsly, eventually, determines our destiny. That is a fact. There is a lot to be said about monitoring one’s thoughts. Just stand back and monitor what you are thinking. Weird concept? its not. Its practice, just like anything else. You will get good at monitoring your own thoughts with time. It will teach you how to stay in the present- yes the old cliche of staying in the moment! Thats what it is all about.

What is going through our minds all the time? Thoughts are primarily either positive or negative. Thoughts of love, ambition, peace, harmony, joy, motivation, faith and happiness are positive thoughts. Regrets, anger, hurt, failure, fear, despair, grudge and hatred are negative feelings. Are your thoughts mainly based on whats happening in your life? If this is the case, remember life is not happening to you- its responding to you. Life is responding to your thoughts and not the other way around. Change your thought to thoughts of positivity and your life will start changing, just like that!